Baby Boy and I pretty much have a showdown every night before bed. It lasts about two to three hours and although I am victorious in the end, it never feels that way. I win the war, but these battles are giving me gangrene. And not simple gangrene, but the nasty maggot loving kind of gangrene.
I am still not sure why he hates bedtime so very much. He falls asleep for nap in about 2.4 seconds every day. I suspect that after a quiet boring day home with just me and Baby Girl, he gets all wound up when the big kids and Daddy come home and he never wants it to end. It could be from the ice cream he has for dinner. We may never know. All we know is that bedtime is a battle.
As befitting the epic nature of our battle, my son has many weapons. Some of them are stealthy. The pretend-to-be-asleep-so-you-loosen-your-grip move. The fake have-to-go-potty move. The aw-look-how-cute-I-am smile move. The I-love-to-read move. Slyly pulling in Daddy with the I-want-daddy-no-now-I-want-mommy move.
Some of them are overt. Scream. Wail. Thrash your body like a grounded shark. While screaming and wailing. Rum (screaming and wailing) down the hall that tragically leads to just a different torture room with beds. Fall dramatically to the floor in hopeless misery...while screaming and wailing.
He is also very adaptable. When things aren't working he retires them for a while, only to yank them back out on an unsuspecting mama a few days or weeks later. He also creates new moves when neccessary. This picture illustrates his latest move...the "Mama...Lap!" move.
In this move he basically refuses to lay anywhere but my lap. And he is super specific about how he does this - any part of my lap won't do. He must be laying in between my legs with his whole little body curled around one leg with his head up on one hip. Which, unless I cut him an airhole, means that is as high as I can cover up with my blankets. It also means I need to lay on my back, which I hate and cannot sleep on. Also...bladder pressure. Damn kid was supposed to stop putting pressure on my bladder after I pushed him out, wasn't he? I think it was in the contract...
I will prevail. I come a little closer every night. The minor victories are starting to pile up. Last night he slept on his own bed for ten full hours straight. There is light at the end of the tunnel. I just hope the gangrene doesn't get me before I see it.
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