So I am not really going to be quick to jump into regular life, even though things are opening up. However, we are loosening up a bit and expanding our circle. We decided that any immediate family member that feels the same as us is welcome to be part of our circle - which means our kids get their cousins back. And their aunts and uncles. And their grandparents. Baby Girl was so incredibly excited to hug Busia and Grandma. She very sweetly asked them both if she could hug them - not so shockingly, they both said yes. So began a few days of her asking me who she could hug, what she could touch, where she could go...it is a little heartbreaking to see how much it really affected my kids - especially Baby Girl who is, by far, the most social of us all. Our bigger kids get a few select friends back, our Graduate gets her boyfriend back and our Sophomore gets his dude pack back. Our little kids don't get friends back quite yet, but we are thinking of trying a few outdoor playdates in the next week or two.
I know that we can't live cooped up in quarantine all summer, fearing what the fall may or may not bring. I struggle with this. I struggle with handing this anxiety and unease and NOT KNOWING over to God and just living our best lives over here. What if....what if....what if. Not my strong suit. I believe that there will be a second wave and navigating this middle part is tricky. I just don't want to make a bad decision while waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Soooooo...we are just going to work on better behaviors for the things we CAN control. Washing our hands before we sit down to eat anything. Washing our hands properly, not just getting them wet for a second. Using antibac when we are out in the world and wearing masks if we go inside anywhere. Sanitizing things that venture out in the world with us - phones, purses, car door handles. Not touching our freaking faces. Ugh. We are a family of nail biting nose pickers apparently. How did I never see this??? Work in progress...don't shake hands with my kids.
Next week I am going to try going physically into work for a few hours. I miss my partners and our staff and my desk with the snack drawer and my office with no kids in it. I miss participating in adult conversations without having to hide in a dark closet or barricade myself in the bedroom. I typically work from home most of the time in the summers anyway, so this isn't a huge obstacle for me but it will be nice to get to the point where I can run into the office and pick up what I need and have face to face conversations with the people I plan with. While it is a giant blessing to work from home, it is also a little isolating. I am pretty geeked up to head back in when I can.
All in all, we are well. We survived school at home, we are all healthy and mostly sane, Husband is totally back to work and I am creeping slowly back into work. Our kids have at least some of their tribe back in their lives and some places they can go for a change of scenery. And perhaps most importantly...we have grandmas to hug.
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